A Person Who Thinks All The Time. How to Quiet Your Mind and Find Peace.

Are you a person who thinks all the time? Is your mind starting to drive you crazy? 

Do you find yourself not sleeping and worrying a lot, to the point where you are starting to have difficulty concentrating on anything else?

As a niceaholic, I have struggled so much with this too. I overcommitted and felt the responsibility rested solely on my shoulders. I didn’t want to let anyone down. Then add in worrying about what people think and trying to do the right thing all the time. It was exhausting! I thought I was going insane! 

Here is what I have learned to get my mind finally to shut up and stop obsessing about things I have no control over.

I hope it helps you too. Let’s begin!

What does a person who thinks all the time mean? 

A person who thinks all the time might be overthinking things, making them anxious and stressed. This endless worry can cause a person to make decisions based on fear rather than logic.

This habit of hesitating causes us to become overwhelmed with uncertainty,  It can also create a cycle of rumination, in which the overthinker loops back around to the same thoughts repeatedly, becoming even more anxious and stressed.

Too much thinking can be paralyzing, robbing a person of the opportunities for spontaneity, creativity, and personal growth that are so vital in life. When done excessively or without proper focus, overthinking can lead to paralysis by analysis – an overwhelming mental block that keeps people from achieving their goals.

Thinking won’t change your circumstances, the solution is taking action.

What type of person is an overthinker?

An overthinker is usually a very caring and highly intelligent person.

Niceaholics tend to be overthinkers because we don’t want to upset anyone or get in trouble. Someone who struggles with overthinking may also have had bad experiences in the past that make them cautious about making a bad call, such as trauma.

Overthinking tends to affect those of us who are perfectionists as well due to our fear of judgment, and we can be prone to indecisiveness. They think all the time about the different scenarios and what could happen if they make the wrong call.

As a result, they obsess over things and get caught up in their thoughts, which can sometimes make them very stressed out.

What is it called when you can’t stop thinking?

When your mind won’t stop thinking, it’s called rumination. Rumination is defined as the repetitive and intrusive thoughts or images that lead to feelings of distress or sadness. It can be a problem if it’s not treated, as rumination can lead to negative self-esteem, mood swings, and physical health problems.

Rumination is often caused by anxiety or stress, but it can also occur when you’re coping with difficult emotions. When your mind won’t stop thinking, it can feel like there’s nothing else to do but keep replaying the same thoughts over and over again. But ruminators shouldn’t beat themselves up because of this – in fact, there are ways to deal with rumination effectively.

First of all, it’s important to set boundaries for yourself. Make sure you don’t allow your mind to run wild day and night – try setting some limits on how much time you spend thinking (or obsessing) about specific things.

Another strategy for dealing with rumination is mindfulness meditation. This involves paying attention to your breath and body without judgment – simply observing the sensations happening in each moment without getting lost in thought.

Mindfulness practices have been shown to reduce stress levels and help people focus better overall, so incorporating them into your routine may be helpful in combating rumination tendencies.

What causes too much thinking?

Too much thinking can be caused by any number of factors.

Some possible causes include the following:

1. Trying to do too many things at once

When you try to think about more than one thing at a time, it can lead to being overloaded and overthinking. Instead of focusing on one task, break it down into smaller, easier-to-understand pieces.

2. Focusing on negatives rather than positives

Too Much thinking revolves around looking for negatives in everything instead of finding positives – this mindset creates problems that are difficult (and sometimes impossible) to solve because they are buried under mountains of negative thought patterns!

Practicing positive visualization techniques – picturing yourself achieving your goals – can help shift your focus from the difficulties inherent in any goal towards the rewards awaiting you when you achieve it.

3. Overloading on information

People who think too much also want to make sure they have alll the information at hand, in case they are missing something. There is a lot of information available today which can easily overwhelm our brains if we don’t take steps to limit how much we process at once.

Limit yourself to reading or watching only what’s necessary for you to understand the content, and don’t spend too much time online, as it can make you feel even more anxious and worried.

4. Trying to control a situation

When we are stressed, and things feel like they are falling apart, we seek ways to control the impending doom coming our way. Overthinking is a strategy we use to try to find a way to avoid pain.

We are hoping if we think hard enough, we will come up with the idea that will solve all our problems. If we say the right words, it will change everything. If we think hard enough, we can avoid that confrontation.

Sometimes it actually works (our minds are pretty clever when we are cornered!), but most of the time, it doesn’t.

Overthinking is exhausting and when you’re tired, actually saying the right thing at the right time is almost impossible. Annoyingly, the people you are working with don’t follow the script you’ve designed in your head either!

Having control over anyone or anything is just an illusion; overthinking isn’t going to save you; it’s simply going to wreck you.

5. Not feeling safe

When an overthinking episode occurs, it’s often triggered by a situation that reminds you of something upsetting in your past. We just don’t feel safe and we try to use logic to find a safe way through the situation when we are frightened.

This leads to distressed overthinking, which is rarely productive. Instead, try comforting yourself when you go into an overthinking spiral, and addressing the underlying fear with a loved one or professional.

What happens when you have an overactive mind?

People with an overactive mind often feel overwhelmed, panicked, and stressed. The sheer number of thoughts that are running through their heads can be overwhelming and cause them to feel overloaded or out of control. They may find it difficult to focus on anything else, leading to anxiety and constant rumination.

Because they are essentially in the fight or flight response to perceived danger, their heart rate is racing, and they feel really wired.

So, people with an overactive mind often have a hard time shutting down and relaxing, which long term, can lead to health problems such as high blood pressure or depression. It drives you crazy! You can’t seem to shut your mind off.

When I had trouble with excessive rumination, I couldn’t sleep, so insomnia also happens when you think too much. It was torture!

How do you calm an overactive mind?

Below are the steps I took to stop my endless thinking:

10 Steps to Stop Overthinking

1. Uncover the cause of the overthinking.

Is your brain malfunctioning because you have too much on? Are you studying for exams? Going through a breakup? Work doing your head in? Are family pressures getting to you? What is it you are thinking about over and over?

2. Journaling

This step is used to see why it is bothering you.

Are you not feeling appreciated? Do you need someone to take accountability for treating you poorly? Are you trying to control the way others see you? (eg People saying untrue things about you?).

What do you need to happen to feel like the issue is resolved? Is this something you can give yourself? Does it really matter what other people think, and if so, why does it bother you so much? 

3. Let go

This step is harder than these two words imply. Letting go of the hurt and of trying to fix it is very difficult. We don’t like to feel like we are giving up; that’s not in our nature. But, when you move into acceptance, there is peace. When you let things just be…it is very freeing. 

Accepting hurt is the first step to healing it. Once we accept that something has happened and that we are not responsible for the hurt, it opens up space for forgiveness. When we forgive ourselves and others, it takes power away from the hurt and allows us to move on.

4. Get out of your head and into your body.

Getting into your body is also about connecting with your heart and trusting your feelings again. If you feel something, that is enough. You don’t need to rationalize it with an in-depth explanation. If you feel off about someone, don’t force it; step back instead.

5. Stop scrolling

Spend time away from the internet and social media. It doesn’t help you feel any better. Scrolling and searching is a numbing activity we use to avoid the pain our overthinking is causing.

It’s tricky because it feels productive as we look for answers, but it’s keeping the pain alive and probably making it worse. If you are doing this, you need to go back and practice letting go again 🙂

6. Interrupt the pattern

When you notice you are starting to overthink again, you must interrupt the pattern and distract yourself before your thoughts get momentum.

It doesn’t matter how you do this…as long as you pull yourself up. So you may want to say “stop it,” sing a song, move your body, do whatever you need to do to stop the thoughts from taking off, and break the pattern.

7. Practice

This isn’t going to be a 24hr fix. It will take time, maybe weeks or even months before you notice the thoughts start to slow down. If you are disciplined, it will go quicker for you. Consistency is key.

While it feels like your brain is breaking, it’s actually just a bad habit you’ve picked up during a very stressful time. You need to practice unlearning it.

8. Take action

There is so much time you can spend thinking, before it becomes inevidable you need to take action. The problem with taking action is the overwhelm. Using the insights from above, write down the next 3 steps that will move the needle significantly for you. The idea is to create momentum and get moving again.

If you are completely frozen and can’t make yourself move forward because of the fear, try Mel Robbins 5,4,3,2,1 system, it will completely change your life!

9. Hypnosis or Meditation

Hypnosis helps so much because it bypasses your rational mind and speaks directly to your subconscious. This is the part of your brain responsible for survival, the amygdala, and it is emotional, not rational.

Hypnosis connects directly to the subconscious and, with the right program, can calm your amygdala and make it feel safe again.

When you feel safe, you make better decisions and have more resilience in difficult situations.

Meditation also works because it retrains your brain. You are practicing keeping it on a short leash and not letting it run wild anymore. 

10. Speak to a professional

If thinking too much is starting to affect your mental health, and nothing you do seems to work, it might be time to chat with a professional. They have many tools and strategies to help. While it can be expensive, it’s worth it when you think of all the time lost spinning your wheels and the damage you are doing to your mind in the meantime.

Final Note

I just want to tell you, you aren’t alone, and you will be able to stop this. (And no, you aren’t going insane!).

It will take work, but if you follow the steps above and be really gentle with yourself, you will come through the other side. I know because I did it, and I thought it would never end. It was horrible.

Remember, this is a bad habit, and bad habits can be reversed. 

Practice letting go of the people and thoughts that hurt you, and give yourself an internal hug every time you are feeling overwhelmed.

Just don’t give up, keep going, and one day, you will notice you haven’t had those thoughts in ages 🙂

I know you can do this and as I always say, remember to be kind to yourself, lovely.

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